Thursday, November 10, 2011

the opposite of help

A diligent mother may successfully banish certain bad words from her vocabulary.  But tell me mothers, are not those banished words simply replaced by other equally unhelpful words?

And really, what's the harm in letting out a little frustration?  Maybe I FEEL like being ineffective and counter-productive as I manage my kids today.  Maybe I LIKE giving them one more reason to tune out the sound of my voice.

Oh, you don't know what I am talking about?  Well then, I have started a list for you.  Store these words in your brain (pile them on top of the curse words,) and use them next time you sit on something wet, or find yourself in the kitchen with 100 squawking children on your ankles, or hear the 100th scream of the day and it's only 9am... 

Emily's list of unhelpful sayings

That did NOT just happen.

If I had a magic wand, I would use it, but I do not, so you will just have to wait.

Do you LIKE getting hurt?

Didn't I just feed you?

THAT is the opposite of help.

WHY is everything so STICKY?!?!

Didn't I JUST change you?

Where IS your daddy anyways?

Are you kidding me?

Do you LIKE disobeying your mother?

(shrill voice) What were you thiiinkiiiing?!?!?!

What would you add to my list?


  1. I use "Are you kidding me?" All the time. And another favorite is "Seriously?" The children like to use that one back though

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  3. Yes, I use "SERIOUSLY?!?!" too. It sounds pretty funny coming out of the kids' mouths. Especially Marcus. And I also laugh when I hear them say things like that to the dog!

  4. Here's what my kids always hear. I'm not sure why I expect an answer:

    WHAT is going on?
    WHY did you do that?
    What are you doing!?!?

  5. Ditto to laura! I use "really!" I told you so! And how about yelling at them to stop yelling and being so loud.ugh .that one makes me feel like a moron every time! I do love mommyhood and wouldn't trade it for anything.thx for all your wonderful words/sharing everyday .I look forward to it everyday :)

  6. Eldon just said "dogGONEit!" I think I must say that one too!

    Oh yes, I yell at them to stop yelling. and then there's BE PATIENT!!!!!! lol

  7. Thank you, Emily. I think this characteristic happens the minute we become parents, maybe a gene pool realignment or something.

    “You cut your leg off, don’t come running to me!” (admonition of a concerned parent)

    The wonderful thing is that when we become grandparents we get to chuckle at our kids and how they sound. Happens to every generation.


  8. I always say "just stop talking!"...this is usually followed up from the kids by "why?"....

  9. I just heard my Marcus ask Peter, "WHY do you have to be SO DIFFICULT?!" I must say that one too! The list just keeps getting longer!

  10. I say "just stop talking" too Mary.

    Also I do ask if they cut their leg off... and sometimes, if I am feeling really compassionate, I say something like, "If your (finger, arm, foot, whatever) really hurts that bad, I think we might have to cut it off for you... come here and let me look at it!" and what do you know, they are magically cured!


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